Becoming “Dad”

In my life I have been called many things other than “Ryan.”  For my family they have referred to me as:

  • Boo Boo
  • Boo
  • Ry Boo
  • Rye Bread
  • Uncle Boo Boo

My friends know me (depending on what school or state you knew me in) as:

  • Gates
  • Kansas
  • Leroy
  • Rhino

I’m used to being called by a nickname.  I’m comfortable hearing something other than “Ryan” and responding to it.  However, the word “Dad” has changed everything for me.  They say you become a dad the day your child is born (while women become a mom the day they become pregnant).  A friend reminded me of this on Facebook today.  Its something I have heard and read a million times.  I disagree.  I’m sure it rings true for many of us dads-to-be out there but not all of us.

I started this blog to be a place to tell stories and document everything going on in my life with work, moving, family, etc.  Becoming a dad is certainly going to be the biggest topic as it is the biggest thing in my life.  I wanted a place to write genuine letters to my child to express how I am feeling.  That is why I started the “Dear Zig” posts, letters addressed to my child by its current nickname (Ziggy the Zygote).  When I signed the first letter as “Dad,” something certainly popped in my head.  I was a dad.  My fatherhood and responsibilities don’t start in January – they just become more hands on then.  I’m a father now.  It felt strange to sign my name as “Dad.”  That’s my dad’s signature.  I’m “Boo.”  However, it felt extremely right.  The next time I signed as “Dad” it felt even more right.  This was no longer just my dad’s signature…it was mine too, and I suddenly had clarity on my father’s relationship with me.  I’ve always known that I was an extremely loved child and adult but the scope of it is hard to imagine.  Since changing my signature…I am consumed with a need to wrap my mom and dad up in a huge hug and tell them how much I love them and how much I appreciate them and everything they have done for me.  The relationship between parent and child truly is amazing and I cannot wait to get to know the other side better.

 

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4 thoughts on “Becoming “Dad”

  1. Ryan,

    You write beautifully. I can’t wait to read more. I’m more excited for you guys than I can express via mere words, so I’ll just go with the following:
    I’m proud of you – of all three of you, and I love you.
    And thank you! I can’t wait to be an uncle.

  2. Awesome that you are sharing your journey– and that you are already feeling the tug of dadhood. Love to you three.

    1. ok, I’m getting pretty teary-eyed. I love, love, love the way you write and express your feelings. You’ve got me hooked! can’t wait to read more. guess I’ll need plenty of tissue—-laughing ’til I cry or just plain crying

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